The Explorer in Me

Yes I remember a bit, while I was in my mother’s womb. It was boring; I could hear different voices and sounds unheard other than the heartbeat I hear. I thought it will be exciting out there. So I thought I wanted to get out or am I really stuck here forever. Some months passed away and I was out. When the first ray of light hit my eyes I realized, “Yes finally I am out, to the world of adventure, fun and excitement”. I was carried by so many people.  I saw new things, heard new sounds. But I couldn't get things I wanted  ,see places I wanted because my limbs not yet started to work as I wish . I understood it takes time to make it work the way I wanted. I thought why not wait, I waited for long to get out now I am out, so why not for some more time. 

    It took time; I had to work hard so that I could get up on my knees. Now I could go to places (within a room, of course). I could explore, I am more than happy. Slowly I could move my legs, now I can move faster than before and to more places. It had different feeling I could not understand it at first. Later I came realize that it is a feeling called freedom, what everyone seeks in this world ultimately. And with the increase in area of my explorations, my thoughts too started to explore more areas of curiosity. It was my age of curiosity. Curiosity towards things, feelings and so on. And I understood we can never live with curiosity. Curiosity is the reason for many things in this world, some turned out to be good, some bad. Like a traveler has curiosity to see places, politicians have curiosity for power, all have curiosity for more money and the list goes on.

            My curiosity was at that time about things and places. I tried to reach wherever I can. And days passed feeding my curiosity. Now I can speak too. Now there is another field of curiosity, my sound. When I am happy and make a sound it is called ‘laugh’ and whenever I laugh all around me laughs seeing my cute laughing face. And when I am sad and make a sound it is called ‘cry’, it makes other tensed thinking why I am making that sound. And they give me everything I want when I cry. And this became a good way to fulfill my desires, to see places and experience new things. And I could hear all the grown up version of me talking. I cannot understand a lot and so do they when I try to communicate in my sound. Slowly I learned their sound. And it has lot of another sounds than mine, it is called ‘language’. I speak the one my parents used. And I started experimenting with it. My tongue took time to adjust with the new language which I was about to learn. But I understood language as a way of expression of thoughts, but when we are closer to someone don’t even need the language to understand the feelings.

        The explorer in me started getting many limitations. My parents started warning me about restrictions I had to explore. And slowly I think I started an inhibition towards exploration. The spark of fun, I had in taking risks and exploring the curiosity it was blown off. And as I grew older and stronger the explorer in me was walking away from me. And I am afraid if that explorer, curiosity in me to know and experience new things in this world   , will walk away far from me...