From 4G to 2G

The sun was gleaming with its rays. I was standing in my usual bus stop and trying to avoid the sunlight even though it's and irony since i work under the sun usually. My restless mind kept looking at my watch thinking that i will be late . Late is something I don't like to add to my character. And the bus came . I with a little struggle managed to get into the bus . It was a Monday morning and usually it's so crowded on Mondays since everyone will be returning to the office from home with a face as if they are been forced to a place they don't like . I am no exception to that feeling and my face was not too alien to that feeling since I have it on my face too . I was standing in that crowded bus . Suddenly a man rose from his seat next to me , then as if it was like a bullet just shot from a gun a man came and sat in that . I was too slow since by the time that man sat I just made up my mind to sit . He was like a 4G connection in the 2G world wen it comes to getting na seat. Suddenly an absolute silence came from somewhere. The only sound was the roaring of the old engine . And there was only one thought in my head too. And a vision , and rest of the things in m head was blurring in the background.That made me think if I was trying to be 4G too.  My routine was programmed. All I have to do in the morning  was get up when the alarm goes off . Rest of the things is programmed like a robot . And the only minute I think after i wake up is when i am in the bus . Like this at this precise moment when one of my hands is in the rail on the top of bus and another hand on the seat for the support to stand straight in that crowd. This is the moment of truth for my everyday. I always think if this is how I going to be further in my life . I see guys much older than me , with shirts tucked in and nice shoes and a bag on the shoulder. At some point I see myself standing there . With the same expression of unhappiness and fear and insecurities I have now which multiplied several year . Then a lightning of thoughts struck my head. A lightning mixed with feeling of fear , anxiety and all the feelings which spills out the adrenaline in me. It was kind of look back moment for me too. 

We live in a fast moving world. Our smartphone is faster, our transportation is faster, our connections are faster (3G,4G). There is a shift from the thought that , earlier it was ‘ we had 24 hours a day ‘ now it shifted to ‘ we just have 24 hours a day’. The shift was that we have to do so much things with this little time . This little time when this earth takes the effort to rotate on its axis. We have started to enjoy less of our time . And we started to live the next moment , not the moment we have , but the moment we are about to have . A faster connections have made us impatient. This impatience have taken its root in all over characters , from waiting in a queue, waiting for a reply, waiting . Waiting. I wonder if this impatience will consume me more and more . And if I will forget to to be here at this precise moment than to be in the next. I have to slowly convince my head that I only have now. The present and hence its called the PRESENT. Slowly slowly , like I learned to walk when I was a toddler , I have to teach myself consciously. Slowly .. In this 4g world I have to learn to be 2G .

What I think, when I see a crowd of people…

What I think, when I see a crowd of people…

 Whenever I see a group of people in a public place, like in a bus stand or railway station or somewhere, I see a lot of pattern. I see bored faces, living their patterned life. I usually wonder why it is  like this, why people chose to be sad and have a boring life. And I never understood it either at first because I was standing among them in that crowd, following a patterned life.

I started searching for the reason why a majority of people and youth like me end up like that. The reason I could understand was many. Some of it are.

1.       Play safe.

Now most of the people want to play thing safely. In fact, it starts with our childhood. Our parents choose the best school they can with their pocket. From there, the programmed life starts. We come out of school and still don’t know what to do with life. You come to one of important juncture in your life and you see a group going towards the engineering path. Some rare people chose otherwise. And after four years of that still no idea what to do with life. The only difference is that you have degree with the same thought you had when you entered the college. We all have different ideas in our life. But the idea of
PLAYING SAFE life drag us from trying something new. That is we all wanted a life that is too programmed and SAFE. So that we know where we are going, don’t want to try anything new, be on the safer side. We want to make our life secure that’s all.

2.       We think , but don’t  act  because we …….Afraid

Yes the reason we all want to play safe is, we all are afraid to do. We never want to risk anything. We never believe in us, our thoughts. We never give it a try. We are afraid we may not reach we would love to and won’t give it a try. Some says it is because of my situation. And we always think we wanted to do so many things, but we never do it. We want to go with our passion but something always holds us up. That thing is our fear. 

3.       It’s not going to work.. Only works for great people.

That’s another reason, our ATTITUDE. We always believe it won’t work for me and we won’t give it a try either. The reason for this may be also with society we live in  , we live in a less motivated society. But that’s wrong. The change should start from our head, from US. We should have a proper attitude towards things.

4.      We give up too easily

  We want to achieve something in life and with that in mind we chose something, something we dont love to do. so during the long run we forget to love ourselves and what we do and we give up. 

So what we really will think when all the time has passed on with our thoughts to do something, but we never did anything. And on our death bed we will think, we should have lived my life instead of someone else’s. That’s when we really going to regret. We can never rewind our life then. We only have NOW, yesterdays are gone and tomorrows are never coming.